Feeling Lonely in Motherhood? How Gemma Van Slyke Built the Community She Needed
Ep. 88 on the All Figured Out Podcast
When Gemma Van Slyke became a mother for the first time, she was living in Australia. The experience? Supported, structured, and filled with care. Fast-forward to her second postpartum season—this time in Vancouver—and things looked very different. Sparse follow-up care, little community, and that all-too-familiar sense of where is my village?
That stark contrast didn’t just leave her frustrated—it inspired her to act.
In Episode 88 of All Figured Out, Gemma shares how two wildly different postpartum experiences changed everything for her, and how they led to the creation of The MotherFlock—a Vancouver-based community for moms navigating the shift of matrescence and searching for connection after the baby bubble.
Whether you’re a first-time mom, managing life with toddlers, or reflecting on your early parenting years and wondering why they felt so lonely, this episode speaks to the deep need for connection and care in motherhood.
Postpartum Support: It Shouldn’t Be a Luxury
When Gemma gave birth in Australia, she was blown away by the support. Six home visits from a maternal health nurse in the first week alone. A built-in mothers group with other parents who had babies the same month. Ongoing check-ins that didn’t require her to chase down care providers.
In her words: “That was just the default. And it made a massive difference.”
Compare that to her experience giving birth in Vancouver—minimal follow-up, a missed infection diagnosis, and no real community until she created it herself. It’s not that Canada doesn’t have incredible care providers, but often the system puts the onus on new parents to seek help when they’re least equipped to do so.
What Is Matrescence—And Why Does It Matter?
If you’ve never heard the term matrescence, you’re not alone. Gemma hadn’t either—until she was already in the thick of it with baby number two. Matrescence refers to the physical, emotional, hormonal, and identity-based changes that occur during the transition into motherhood.
We give adolescents years of grace and support to move through their developmental shift—but for mothers? Society expects us to “bounce back” in six weeks.
Gemma calls this out, and this episode explores how naming the identity shift was one of the first steps toward healing, self-compassion, and finding her purpose.
Creating The MotherFlock: From Loneliness to Legacy
Inspired by the support she experienced in Australia—and frustrated that nothing similar existed in Vancouver—Gemma created The MotherFlock, a growing community for postpartum parents looking for connection, guidance, and a soft place to land.
What started as a creative outlet quickly turned into her “unicorn space” (as coined by Eve Rodsky), giving her both purpose and a way to help others avoid falling through the cracks. From postpartum meetups to guest expert speakers and storytelling spaces, The MotherFlock is already making a huge impact—and it’s just getting started.
Key Takeaways from the Episode
Support systems matter—and they vary drastically depending on where you live.
You are not meant to “bounce back.” Matrescence is a real, ongoing transformation—and it deserves care.
Community doesn’t have to be huge to be meaningful. Sometimes it’s just three moms at a café.
If the thing you need doesn’t exist yet, maybe it’s yours to build.
Who is Gemma Van Slyke?
Gemma Van Slyke is a former teacher and the founder of The MotherFlock, a Vancouver-based support community for postpartum parents. She believes that motherhood doesn’t have to be isolating—and she’s here to help build the village.
About Andrea Barr, host of All Figured Out
Andrea is a certified career and life coach for parents. Through her coaching, she supports parents in finding better work-life rhythms so they can continue to grow personally and professionally without sacrificing family time.
Connect with Andrea via Instagram here.
